Thursday, April 24, 2008

Me and 6'4 = No More


EDIT: And anyway, who needs a 6'4 when you can jack off to this with no strings attached??? tee hee.. can I even say that? I swear, if Idris ever reads my blog, I am getting my ass whooped..... I'll take it though..
As I alluded to yesterday, me and 6'4 are finally done. Before the reunion, everything was grand. I purchased a subscription of Today's Bride magazine, and I was choosing a list of bride's maids (which would've included everyone who attended the Reunion).

I digress. Soooo, I told 6'4, whose real name is Albert (I have no need to protect his identity anymore because we are no longer together, and I don't care)... Sooo, I told Albert that I would be going to the reunion and I wouln't be able to spend a lot of time with him . we had this conversation like 2 weeks ago. He wanted to go to some of the events, but I told him no, because it was a BLOGGER FAMILY REUNION!! 2 MySpace blogs don't count sir!

So, Sunday, after the NJ kids left (and btw, Ty, I know you wrote a fabulous post, but your blog doesn't show up on my phone + I'm computer-less at this point in time. no shade. lotsa love ; ).. So, Sunday, after the NJ kids left, I showered, took a quick nap, and headed over to Al's house. He was acting some kinda way. Very quiet, distant, attitude-y. I asked him what was wrong. "Nothin". I asked him if I had done something "No." I asked him if he was hungry. "No." So then he says "I'm going to my friend's house. I'll just see you whenever."

WOW.

So after that, I went to my sister's and just chilled, laughed, talked to her about my weekend, but then I got bothered by Albert's attitude. I texted him saying "Babe, I haven't seen you all weekend and I miss you." to which he responded, "So when your friends are here, I'm not good enough for you, but when they're gone, you wanna be in my face? Are you ashamed of me?"

Did he just take it to another dimension? Oh but I thank God hunny.

So I told him of course not and I love him and nobody else had their bfs and stop trippin', etc etc.

So then he reverted to this I want to be left alone mode where he claimed he wanted to be left alone but yet he went to the club, and was full of life at work.... but you want to be left alone right?

So finally, OJ (Old Jared)came out and he said, "Fuck It" : )

Yesterday he texted me and asked me when he could come get his things because our relationship was built on a lie and he couldn't do it any more, so I promptly packed his toothbrush, his hair brush, and his towels and his cologne and his bball shorts and dangled them over the balcony of my apartment. He's tall. He'll get it.

So, as is standard after every breakup that I have, I did something crazy. I cut all the hair off of my face, cut my mohawk, and enrolled myself in bartending school. Since he has so much time now, maybe he'll see me slingin' drinks shirtless ; )

I'm doing a whole lot bebtter than I thought I would be, and actually, I fell happy and free.

Today I got my FrEaKuM dReSs out of the cleaners too!
..::Sidebar::.. Do you guys remember that "All the pork you can eat diet" thing from the Klumps? I am still getting my life on that from the reunion...LMFAO!

; )

21 comments:

Promiscuous X said...

Awwww sorry to hear that. I thought after I texted you last nite yall would had resolved the issue. Guess not. Sorry to hear that..

LMMFAO at "freakum dress out the cleaners lol" EATTTTTTED!!!!!! (THATS FOR YOU NORRIS) LMAO

Andre J. Allen II said...

hate the relationship ended but i am glad u bounced back. take this time now to get you together. the freakum dress u go!

Dusty Boot said...

u r sumthin else. Long time no see! glad to hear you're doing alright. -- Gil.

E said...

Wow. That's so crazy. It's like he took jealousy to a whole nother level. Sorry to hear things ended like that but it sounds like it's for the best.

I chuckled when you said you purchased a subscription to Today's Bride. I'm guilty myself of putting the horse before the cart when it comes to men. It's like I always picture the two of us living together, being the power couple, etc., etc. But usually they would do something to fuck that vision up. Luckily I finally found a good one. And you will too.

Sean Stone said...

This too shall pass. And you're doing quite well adjusting. I love your resilence. Put your freakum dress on...

ShawnQt said...

"...and dangled them over the balcony of my apartment. He's tall. He'll get it."

I love, Love it, Love it! So Beyonce!

But now your a bartender? Can u even do that at 18? lol What a change in a week, life keeps going huh!

Happy for you!

C. Baptiste-Williams said...

funny

Darius T. Williams said...

BBBBIIIIIIIIIIITTTTTTTTTTCCCCCCCCHHHHHHHHH - I am FALLING OUT at that all pork diet from the clumps. That's it - I'm going to rent it TONIGHT! Do you hear me? Jared, you sure have a special place in my heart. But that Clumps shit is absolutely hilarious OMG!

Anyway, you're young, resiliant, and will bounce back without a problem! Have fun in bartending school - I hear there are cuties there.

Alright for cutting off your hair like you're one of the girls from Waiting to Exhale.

Be good bootz!
-DTW

Ty said...

lol I know that my blog isn't .. cell phone compatible. I am in the process of changing it and my website. Hopefully that will fix it.

I remember 6'4 or Albert (wasn't that Danny Glover character's name in the Color Purple?) was trippin when we were at the restaurant on Sunday over the phone. Surely, I don't know what to say but maybe send him the pic so he can see that you REALLY were with friends last weekend. If he doesn't come around, then oh well.

Joey Bahamas said...

Ch....*sucks my teeth* Albert can have a clorox cocktail on the house...I'm buying!

I just about shit myself when u slipped in that "Oh but I thank God". In fact I'm still in danger of doing so...LMAO

I want to see this new clean face, and I wanted to do bartending school too. Call me whore...Verizon is not being choice right now...Love you!

JB

SpecialK261 said...

hmm..damn..break ups and b/fs...umm..sounds a lil petty though..well not you per say but if that's the reason why you guys broke up in its entirity then i feel as though...more could be done/said....good luck either way though...

That Dude Right There said...

Chile, drop that zero and get yourself a hero!!!

But if it's Idris Elba you are after, i'm coming at your ass with razor blades and alcohol!!!!

WhozHe said...

Sorry that love relationship didn't work out, trust me you'll have plenty of others.

fuzzy said...

My eyes!!! My precious eyes!!! I saw way too much! We wasn't gone when you got in the shower!!! lol

There was one exception, SHAWN AND I!!! But we are a special case lol

I see that freakum dress and I love God as well, but this time I love him for you! That dangling out of the balcony was funny as hell! Can i come down for a weekend some time soon? lemme know!

Cocoa Rican said...

Aww....if he ain't good to ya', then he ain't good for ya'....let go, let God...you know the drill.

I have two lines from the reunion - that we got from TV - that won't leave my head and crack me up when I think of them...

1. "Florida??!! Florida??!! Why is my name Florida???!!! It's the name of a state. (Family Guy)

2. "You lint licker!!!" (Orbitz Commercial)

You can serve drinks for another two years pa...by then you should be a pro and have some pecs to sit those cock-tails on. LOL

Monie said...

Aw, I'm sorry about the break up Jared. It does seem like you handled it well though.

I'm glad you had fun at the reunion.

Chet said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Chet said...

What is it about Spring Time and couples spliting up? I am sadden to hear that you have gone your seperate ways. Just as Sean Stone said "This too shall pass." If you want to talk or feel the need to vent I would kindly lend you my ear. Be strong.

Mr. Jones said...

You know my attitude when it comes to guys...fuck 'em and the high horse they rode in on. How dare he cop an attitude for gracing us with your presence. Tell him to 'kick rocks, hoe.'

Catching an attitude for attending the BFR. How dare he?

Use this as a learning experience, Jared. You shouldn't be dating people with wack ass manes like Albert anyway.

Mr. Jones said...

Edit: 'manes' should read 'names'. Apparently I forgot to take my dyslexia medicine this morning.

RocaFella07 said...

Yes Ma'am!!!

I'm glad that your bouncing back alright.

Good luck!

;-)